Pocatello Blizzard!

Last weekend we had the chance to drive up to Pocatello for Walker's Lacrosse team. We headed up ahead of the snow on Friday evening and arrived about 7:30pm. On the way up we had a chance to show Cameron a lot of cows. They were all over on the place in the fields along the highway. He really enjoyed that and just couldn't stop talking about the baby cows. At one point he asked me if I could see any cows and I told him that I didn't see any right then. He responded so quickly with, " Put them in your eyes, Mom" So cute! So logical to a two year old.

When we arrived in Pocatello, it had just started snowing. After we checked into the motel, we headed over to Perkins for a late dinner. We had a really nice time there and the food was very good! James googled them when we left and found that Salt Lake actually has a Perkins Cafe up north that has a limited menu, so we are going to have to give them a visit. We really liked the key lime pie! By the time we headed back to our motel it was snowing pretty good. The wind was kicking up and we were a bit worried. I watched a true blizzard out the window of our room for hours! The wind never slowed and the snow fell sideways until about three in the morning. I thought for sure our games would be cancelled. No dice! They just shoveled the snow off the field and marched on! I guess this is to be expected with any spring sport in the Northwest. By the time we were up at 6:30, the sun was coming up and the snow was gone. The wind, however, was not! We got to sit out in below freezing temperatures with constant wind and 40 mph gusts for eight hours!!!! I have never been so cold in my life! Really puts what the pioneers dealt with into perspective! We went and sat in the car with the heater every once in awhile to warm up a bit. I was a kind of worried about the little ones, but everybody did pretty well, all things considered, until the last game. That is when Daddy had to go and stay with most of them in the car until the end. They just couldn't take anymore!

Walker got a lot of game time and had a really good time! He even got to play in the second varsity game and got to do a few face offs! He was very pleased with that! All in all, it was a fun trip. We had a really good time and were very thankful that Grandma and Grandpa got to go up with us, too! We could never have attempted the trip without them!

I know that Pocatello, Idaho is in no way a glamorous vacation destination, but it was still so nice to get away if only for a day. We so rarely go anywhere. It just isn't in the budget with this large family, so when we do get the chance it is very fun. And for some reason, sleeping somewhere else always makes coming home so nice! I will add pictures as soon as I spot the camera!:)

On A Happier Note

So, my last entry was such a downer! I haven't been in the mood or position to blog for quite some time, but after that last rant, I knew I better get my buns in gear! Let's dive right in! Cameron is killing me with the funny things he says. Just tonight, when James was holding him, he was playing with his feet and gently slapped the bottom one. Cameron looked up at him in shock and Scolded" You slapped my foot! naughty, naughty!" This was not long after I was scolded by him after he had woken from his nap. He got all bent out of shape for some reason, turned to me, and firmly told me to be nice to him! This kid is my most independent little stinker by far. He has wanted to everything for himself for quite some time, but lately, he is getting more and more frustrated at anyone trying to help him. He loudly states he can do it and not to help him. Cute that he tries, but he is still so little, he needs a lot of help. For example, Cameron tells me he does not like diapers, so he goes to the potty several times a day on his own by climbing up onto the potty unassisted. When I try to put the new diaper on, Cameron wiggles around telling me how much he does not like diapers and then insists that he can put it on on his own. This baby just barely turned two! People are amazed all the time at how much he speaks. We call him our little parrot because he repeats nearly everything he hears and then uses it at appropriate times. Most of what he says is completely understandable to most as well. I am stunned really. None of the other kids have ever been so interested in communicating! It just goes to show that despite any efforts on the part of the parents, every child has their own set of gifts and strengths from the start! The most common phrases we hear from him are: I need you, leave me alone, how dare you, cuddle me, don't leave me, can I drive?, and no thank you! What a hoot! Can you tell this little guy has got me wrapped around his finger? Just a bit!:)

We are heading up to Idaho this weekend for a double-header in Pocatello. The weather looks dry but cold, so I am a bit worried about having all the kids outside for about seven hours! it will be a long day, but it will be fun. I really enjoy Lacrosse and I learn a little more each game. Maybe by next year I will know what's going on! Walker is having so much fun and is really excited about the little trip. It will be nice to get away even if only for a day and it is to Idaho. I will post pictures after we get home.:)

Morgan is only two months away from her big surgery. I didn't realize how close it was getting until we were at the orthodontist today. After our next apt. we will be scheduling for her pre-op visit! I try not to think about how tough it is going to be on her. My heart aches at the thought of her little face all bruised and swollen. I know it is necessary, but I still feel like a jerk for being the one dragging her in for all this. It is so hard watching your babies suffer. And yet, our suffering is so little compared to so many others. How can I complain? I remember so vividly the first time we took Morgan up to PCMC. She was two weeks old and I was so upset. I had so much on my shoulders. Then, I opened my eyes and saw all the other children in the waiting room. Suddenly pity for myself was erased and replaced with such shame at having thought my life was so hard! Shame on me for being worried about what other people thought. Shame on me for being worried about what she looked like or how scared I was. We were given a challenge. Nothing more. Any easy challenge by comparison. How lucky are we? Very. She is beautiful and well adapted. Hardly ever has she been teased. We have the most gifted surgeon there is! We have PCMC in our back yard! Oh, the blessings!

Walker is a Star scout now and well on his way to becoming a Life. He just returned from a camping trip to Moab last weekend. I don't think I will ever get the red dirt out of his socks! I am so grateful for his dedicated Scout Leaders and for his desire to be part of the scouting program. It is such a blessing!

All the other kids are doing well. I will wait and post about the rest of the family until I get my pictures up!

Life really is good, despite the tough days.

I try not to complain. I don't see the purpose usually. But tonight I am awake at 3:00 in the morning again. I am in so much pain, I want to sleep but cannot. Every breath hurts. Every slight move is painful. I am so tired of being in pain. I go to bed at night in pain and I wake up in the morning in pain. I move through the day, every day in pain. I try not to snap at my babies, but when you hurt all the time, everything is the last straw. I have no more straws, no more rope. I don't understand why I have to suffer from this when I am supposed to be a good Mom. I feel most days that I am just not living up to my end of the deal. My kids deserve more. My husband deserves more. How can I be more when every day begins with the deck stacked against me?I am supposed to have more faith. I know this, but still cannot find it. I used to be so sure the Lord would heal me if I just kept having faith, but the more years that pass, the less faith I have. I miss me. Really rough day, sorry. Thought I needed to write it out. Helps a bit, I guess. My baby is crying. No rest for the weary.

Busy, Busy!!

It has been quite a long while since my last post! I have truly been the busiest I have ever been! So many things have been going on here in our world. We have had two birthdays. On the first of February, our little Cam turned two! First, we had a family dinner party on Sunday and then we had a nice little family party for him at Chuck e cheese's on Monday.

At Christmas time, the kids got a large gift card to Chucky's from Uncle Critter and Aunt Jackie. We decided as a family early on that we thought it would be great to use it for Cam's birthday, so that we did! The kids all got tons of tokens and had a blast playing for hours! We did, however miss having our Makenna with us. She has quite a fear of people dressed in costume that has always hampered Halloween, but it seems to be getting worse and is keeping her from enjoying a lot of fun stuff with the family. We instead sent her out on a date with Grandma and Grandpa. She had a great time at Chili's with them and we brought her a cute little stuffed animal from our fun at the arcade. It turned out well. Cameron couldn't stop talking about it, saying Chucky Cheese over and over for days!

Walker turned 14 at the beginning of March. I still cannot believe every year that passes with him. I think that he being my oldest is what makes everything he does so unbelievable to me. He is taller than me, much stronger than me, smarter than me! He is turning into such a great young man. I can only take credit for so much with him. I would like to think I am the greatest Mama there is, bit I have to admit he came to me pretty darn awesome. He just has such a strong conviction to do good and to avoid all evil. I am not worried about him. I mean, he is still a teenager and gives me plenty of grief, but not in the way so many do. He is a great kid and I am so thankful for him and the example is to his younger siblings. Lucky me!

Walker also started playing Lacrosse for Murray High this year. He is loving it! He has definitely found a passion for the sport I didn't think he could. He has never been one for sports up to this point, so it really shocked me when he said he wanted to play. I was not about to get in his way, so we went for it and he is really happy. He has practice every school day for two hours and then one or two games a week. It has been quite the time commitment for me getting him back and forth everywhere he needs to be. On Wednesday and Thursday he has Scouts after practice and doesn't end his day till after nine. Needless to say, we are crazy around here lately, but it is nice to be busy. I am really loving the changes I am seeing in him. A new found confidence has emerged in him. He is really pleased with his new muscle definition and budding six-pack! I can't believe my baby is a man! Help!!!!

When we got our tax return last month we decided to finally replace our living room furniture after 15 years of marriage. The old stuff was broken, mismatched and frankly, embarrassing. We have always wanted a nice big sectional, so that is what we got! The entire family can sit on the couch together. No more fighting over spots on the couch. Everyone fits! I cannot believe what a difference it makes with our family time. Even scriptures every night have become less of a challenge. Who knew a big couch could make me so happy!